Things you all should stop saying to young married couples

I know, I know, I just posted. But this is an addendum to what I just wrote about. You need to stop harassing young married people. Not everyone wants babies. Some of us want babies very badly, but can't have them. In our society, people assume that families always happen a certain way, but the truth is, they don't. You just can't tell what personal things are going on, so it's best not to assume.
Here's an awesome bulleted (again) list to help you stop irritating young married people and keep your relationships healthy. A lot of people suffer from infertility, so this might help in a lot of situations. Also, if you do some of these things, maybe you're beyond helping:

• Please stop asking us when baby will show up. Period. DON'T. Especially if you don't know us.
• Don't force the subject. Maybe we're not ready to talk yet.
• DO NOT demand that we start working on it. Particularly, don't use the argument that you want to babysit our child. Like I'm going to let you near my spawn, Crazypants.
• Whatever you do, don't come near my stomach and try to listen to my empty uterus. It's obscenely wrong. And crazy.
• Don't bombard us with religion. Some of us (like Jacob and I) feel our religion is extremely personal, and like to keep it private, because that's how we best utilize it. Being overly pious makes us uncomfortable, but that's coming from a Midwestern Lutheran and a small town Catholic, and it might work for others. It's just territory you may want to be cautious exploring.
• Stop telling me to "relax" and it will happen. Sometimes, when you don't know the whole story, that's really hurtful.
• Don't complain about your own kids in front of me. That hurts too. I would love to be in your situation.
• In the same breath, stop telling me how awesome kids are and that I should have them. Also, extremely hurtful.
• Don't try and soften the blow by telling me that kids will just ruin my body/sleep cycle/party schedule. I'm not an idiot; I know what I'm getting involved with.
• Telling me about  your sister/cousin/friend that went through the SAME THING doesn't really help, and it's really just wasting our time when we could be drinking wine and eating fatty fat fat foods.
• Don't remind me about all the homeless kids in the world. I know about that. Like I may have mentioned before: I'm not stupid. Every family makes decisions for their own reasons, and believe or not, adopting a child is a lot more complicated than adopting a puppy.
• Don't assume that I'm horribly jealous or hateful towards you if you get pregnant. I'm VERY happy for you, although on a personal level, which is unrelated to you, I'm still sad. That doesn't mean I'm not going to spoil your kid.
• Don't act weird around me. I'm still me. I still like to joke and go out and talk, I just have my own battles. Seriously guys, it's cool. But don't be surprised if I ask for a hug every now and again.

I think that's a pretty accurate list. Oh, and here's a list of things you SHOULD do, if you encounter friends, family, or acquaintances going through a similar struggle:

• If your friend wants to talk, listen. We like that.
• Be supportive, regardless of what the family chooses.
• Be ready to hug, but also be prepared to give people their space.
• Also, be prepared to give chocolate. And liquor.
• Prayers, good vibes, love never hurt anything.

Basically, just be tactful. I don't think a lot of people either know how to handle this issue, or they go overboard. It's not something society frequently talks about. Just think about poor Beyonce! The press was terrible to her, constantly speculating whether or not she was pregnant, scanning every photo for a baby bump, and all the while, she was suffering through miscarriages and infertility. That has to be absolutely agonizing. That just goes to show how badly we deal with family issues---I won't even go into how we deal with the LGBT community and their struggles with parenthood, or couples who want to adopt in the first place. Yet, we're cool with the Octo-mom. Or Britney Spears' crazy ass. All of it makes me sick. Overall, we're insufferable, but if all of you make an effort to just be more..understanding...things could all turn around. That's really all the world needs. Understanding.